Stillness Is the Key – by Ryan Holiday
Date read: 4/3/20. Recommendation: 8/10.
Holiday has his formula down and he nails it each time. Short, succinct chapters with relevant stories pulled throughout history to illustrate his main ideas. Busyness is a distraction we use to avoid putting in the real work that we must do in order to achieve a sense of stillness. Otherwise, we’ll always be running from something and never learn to be content with ourselves or appreciate the present moment. The ability to pause, reflect, and come back to the now is one skill that great leaders, thinkers, artists, and athletes all have in common. We could all benefit from creating more room for stillness—to limit our inputs, better appreciate the moment we’re living in right now, focus on our own character, and keep things in perspective.
See my notes below or Amazon for details and reviews.
My Notes:
Being present:
“You have plenty on your plate right now. Focus on that, no matter how small or insignificant it is. Do the very best you can right now. Don’t think about what detractors may say. Don’t dwell or needlessly complicate. Be here. Be all of you.” RH
“There is no stillness for the person who cannot appreciate things as they are, particularly when that person has objectively done so much.” RH
You already matter. You don’t need to prove anything else.
Limiting your inputs:
Success isn’t about catching everything before it falls through the cracks, it’s about knowing what to let fall through.
“Knowing what not to think about. What to ignore and not to do. It’s your first and most important job.” RH
To reach a relaxed state of concentration where you can do your best, don’t overanalyze, just do the work: Chop wood, carry water.
Journaling for reflection:
Journaling = spiritual windshield wipers (Julia Cameron). Demands and creates stillness.
In victory learn when to stop:
“Eventually one has to say the e-word, enough. Or the world says it for you.” RH
Joseph Heller (Catch 22) in conversation with Kurt Vonnegut at the fancy party in New York City at some billionaire’s second home: “I’ve got something he can never have. The knowledge that I’ve got enough.”
“When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you.” Lao Tzu
“More does nothing for the one who feels less than, who cannot see the wealth that was given to them at birth, that they have accumulated in their relationships and experiences.” RH
“If a man can reduce his needs to zero, he is truly free: there is nothing that can be taken from him and nothing anyone can do to hurt him.” John Boyd
The path to stillness:
Develop a strong moral compass.
Street clear of envy and jealousy and harmful desires.
Come to terms with the painful wounds of your childhood
Practice gratitude and appreciation for the world around you.
Cultivate relationships and love in your lives.
Place belief and control in the hands of something larger than themselves.
“Give more.
Give what you didn’t get.
Love more.
Drop the old story.” RH
Character:
“We develop good character, strong epithets for ourselves, so that when it counts, we will not flinch.” RH
“Always remember, others may hate you, but those who hate you don’t win unless you hate them. And then you destroy yourself.” Nixon
Perspective:
“In the face of the Sublime, we feel a shiver…something too large for our minds to encompass. And for a moment, it shakes us out of our smugness and releases us from the deathlike grip of habit and banality.” Robert Greene
“The moon you’re looking at tonight is the same moon you looked at as a scared young boy or girl, it’s the same you’ll look at when you’re older—in moments of joy and in pain—and it’s the same that your children will look at in their own moments and their own lives.” RH
“When you step back from the enormity of your own immediate experience—whatever it is—you are able to see the experience of others and connect with them or lessen the intensity of your own pain.” RH
“Here is my secret. It is very simple: It is only with the heart that one can see rightly, what is essential is invisible to the eye.” Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince